JoaquiNews: It's a Bird! It's a Plane! But It's Not So Super...

Damage done by a flock of flying cranes.

LITTLE ROCK— According to a report by The Federal Aviation Administration, an airplane flew smack into a flock of cranes on Friday.  The commuter plane was filled to capacity with members of The Bird Lover’s Club based in South Florida.  They were on their way to a bird enthusiast’s conference in Arkansas, where one of the activities planned was crane-watching.

The cranes hit with such a force that the nose of the plane suffered incredible damage.  Blood and feathers smeared across the windshield of the plane, and one bird actually crashed through a window where it thrashed about in the cabin, uttering sounds of distress as it sprayed blood.  Ultimately, the depressurization in the plane caused the crane to explode, and the passengers became immediately ill at the sight of it.  Two passengers fainted on the spot.

The exploding crane also resulted in a 4-foot hole in the fuselage, putting everyone—both human and fowl—in danger.  Luckily the pilot was able to make an emergency landing, and no one died, although 6 passengers were hospitalized.  Now Southwest Airlines is grounding 79 planes for inspection to ensure they are bird-friendly.

Of the exploding crane incident, Greg Hansen said, “I heard a loud popping sound about three or four minutes before it blew open on us!  It happened right behind me, in the row behind me and it covered about 2 1/2 rows with blood and guts."

"I was texting my sister to make certain that she told my pet birds that I loved them," Brenda Reese said, “It was very, very scary.”

Although loosely based on actual news stories (click the links), this article is FAKE.