National Poetry Month 4: Religion

Religion

(A found poem from a page of Nathaniel Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter)

 Antique

angels

lifting

the

mystic

sanctified

tongues.

Faith is

proof

of           frailty.

Persona Poem for English 3440

Helpmeet

I only winced a little

when God ripped you

from my side, bloody

and swift, leaving a

yawning hollow.

I watched as you explored

your new body;

a butterfly spreading

her wings and I the

abandoned cocoon.

But then you smiled with

fruit juice dripping

from the corner of your

apple lips, your mouth a

yawning hollow

where I could see our bleak

future.  I cried and, in my

fallen state, tore off

your wings and crippled

the both of us.

A Text from Sydney

I got a text message this morning from a friend of mine named Sydney.  I haven't talked to her in a while, so it was a nice surprise.  We talked about our busy lives for a bit before she said, "Hey so I hate to like randomly talk to you after forever and then ask a favor... but I'm doing a story on the gay marriage debate for one of my journalism classes and I would love to interview you and Brian."  I wasn't expecting that sort of favor to be asked, but I couldn't say no.  I mean, for a lot of people Brian and I are the only gay couple they know... let alone a married gay couple.  So even though I'm completely swamped in schoolwork this weekend, we agreed to the interview.  She's coming over to film us tomorrow.

That's right, film us.  When I initially agreed to help out I thought it would be for a written article.  But no, she wants to show Brian and I cooking in the kitchen and acting all cute and coupley.  Then we'll sit down for a filmed interview session with her. It's a little nerve-wracking, and I have to remind myself that nobody's going to see it other than her professor and a smattering of classmates at Brigham Young University.

Speaking of BYU, I know that their men's chorus sang at one of the sessions of LDS General Conference today.  I have a couple of gay friends, Michael and Andrew, who sing in that choir.  They were pretty excited to be a part of it all.  Also, while I'm on the topic of gays and BYU students, I know a guy named Nathan Cunliffe who co-created a comic strip for BYU's Understanding Same-Gender Attraction (USGA) organization.  The strip is called Bronicorns and it's about two brothers, one gay and one straight, who attend BYU.  It's pretty cute, so you should check them out!

Ask Joaquin: Why Are You Getting Married?

With all the wedding planning, we've been getting a lot of questions about our marriage.  Due to the sensitive nature of most of them, I've referred to those asking as "anonymous."

From Anonymous:  Why are you getting married if it's not even legal in Utah?

Ever since I was a kid I was taught that when two people loved each other they got married.  Sure, the "two people" were probably explained to me as "a man and a woman," but that didn't stop me from making the blonde Ken doll and the brunette Ken doll ditch Barbie and go marry each other.  So when I grew up years later and realized I was gay, that notion of marrying the one I love didn't go away.  And when Brian asked me to marry him some three years ago, I said "yes."  It just seemed to be the natural progression of things.  You meet, you fall in love, you get married.

And although same-sex marriage is legal in the state of New York, where Brian and I are tying the knot, I am well aware that our marriage license won't mean anything in the state of Utah.  So why bother?  Well, because it means something to us.  It means a lifelong commitment.  It means the start of a family.  It means all of the things that marriage means to straight couples.  Nobody goes into marriage saying, "I'm only doing this for tax purposes and hospital visitation rights."  No, they do it for love.  And while those are the sorts of benefits that will go unrecognized here in Utah, Brian and I will still know in our hearts that we are married.

Besides, we don't plan on living in Utah forever and we will most likely find ourselves in one of the six states that does recognize same-sex marriage someday.  And as the fight for marriage equality continues, I am optimistic that more and more states will embrace it in the future.  The world is changing.  France is on the brink of legalizing same-sex marriage within the next few weeks and not long ago Mexico did the same, joining Canada and ten other countries.

From Anonymous:  Is your marriage some kind of political statement?

Considering it's an election season and Brian's Facebook statuses are hyper-political as of late, I can see where one might get that idea.  However, this is nothing of the sort.  As I stated in the answer above, Brian and I are getting married because we love each other and that's what people in love do!  Far from trying to stir up controversy, I would say our desire to be married is probably the most conservative and traditional thing about us.

From Anonymous:  I love you guys, but my religious views are in opposition to same-sex marriage.  How do I reconcile this?

I'm going to answer this question with a bit of a story.  There's a member of Brian's extended family that expressed a similar sentiment.  She said she loved us and enjoyed our visits to her home, but at the same time worried that by attending our wedding reception she was condoning same-sex marriage which she finds contrary to her religious beliefs.  She took her concerns to the Lord in prayer, and came to the conclusion that Jesus would have gone if he were in her shoes.  We were happy to hear she was able to find a way to reconcile her desire to be supportive with her belief system.

But as much as I would love everyone to take that route, I understand that not everyone will come to the same conclusion.  It's heartbreaking that such a joyous and happy day in my life can bring about negativity... but it has to some degree.  Feeling a little down, my sister sent a text message reassuring me that no matter who may or may not be in attendance, "God sure will be."

BYU's "It Gets Better" Ad

Last weekend Brigham Young University's student group Understanding Same Gender Attraction (USGA) released their "It Gets Better" video.  I knew that it was in the works a long time ago because I have a couple of friends who are in it.  One friend, Nathan, is openly gay and still determined to live a life within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  He embodies the oxymoron "gay Mormon" and strives to follow Church teachings as best as he can, even if it means living a celibate, single life.  My other friend involved in the project, Madison, is straight and soon to be a sister missionary.  She's a strong ally to the LGBTQ community, despite her religious beliefs.

As the video states, there are roughly 1800 homosexual students at BYU, which makes up for about 1/16 of the school's population.  Still a relatively small percentage, but at least Church members are coming to grips with the fact that gay people walk among them.  The Church isn't going to change its stance on homosexuality any time soon, but I feel that the LDS Church is making efforts to be more tolerant and understanding, which was evident in their recent general conference held in Salt Lake City.

Two quotes from President Dieter F. Uchtdorf have spread like wildfire all over social media.  Over the pulpit he made this statement:  "When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm -- please apply the following: stop it."  And, quoting a bumper sticker he once saw, he added, "Don't judge me because I sin differently than you."  And while homosexuality is still seen as a "sin," at least members are being encouraged to remember that they themselves are not perfect either.  We all must stop judging, stop hating, and stop wanting to cause harm.
 
In the words of Jesus Christ, "A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another" (John 13:34).

Here's Nathan's personal interview:



Here's Madison's personal interview: